Shit You Should Know

Sunday, May 22, 2011

I Lost My Boarding Pass

My agnostic mind, although relieved the rapture did not transpire, was intrigued to say the least of the miniscule possibility of people “disappearing”.  Last night, I laid awake thinking about how awful it would be since my husband was on the other side of the planet. How would he get to us?

To say I have an over-active imagination would be an understatement. My mind journeyed through scenario after scenario. I’m the queen of the “what ifs”. Sometimes I wonder why I haven’t locked myself in a closet somewhere.

I called my mother and basically said, “Look. Although I think this is a crock of shit, I wanted to tell you good-bye… just in case I’m wrong.” As an agnostic, I do not claim to know what others are sure about.
As I said, I laid in bed thinking about how things would play out. I thought about if this god decided to take his flock and leave behind the rest of us how angry I would be if he didn’t take my children. What an asshole that would make him to punish the innocent because of my choices and beliefs…or lack thereof.

Also, I wondered what would happen to society. Would we crumble? Obviously something as major as the rapture would change life as we know it. That’s a no brainer but would civilization itself fail to exist? Would we live in a state of post “apocalyptica”…all because some “sheep” disappeared?

Then…of course…my brain turned to zombies. Shocking, right? Me? Zombies?
I thought about if just the souls of the “sheep” were raptured what exactly would be left behind? Lifeless bodies? Rotting corpses? Would these “souls” merely be the thing that makes us human in the first place? Would the rapture of these souls leave behind the living dead, violent…without any remorse? After all if those of us left behind are to be punished and tormented until the grand finale of existence than that would sure be how I’d fuck with folks if I was this god people are so set on selling their souls to.
That’s another thing…the concept of being “left behind” is ludicrous to me. Why would a god after mercilessly torturing his strayed flock allow them to still “accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior” to avoid eternal damnation? Does that sound stupid to anyone else? I mean, holy fuck! Who in their right mind would choose NOT to believe at that point?????? So, in other words…regardless of how you live this life post rapture you still get to go to heaven. You may just need to deal with a few minor setbacks like some plagues and shit.

Now some people are demanding a public apology from a one Harold Camping who started this rapture nonsense. I guess I’d feel the same way if I shared similar beliefs.  If I was a believer…especially if I was one of his followers I’d be pissed. Some people took this nonsense as gospel. As with anything, you’ve got your coo coo banana heads that take a small slice of crazy pie and turn it into a whole freaking bakery like this loco broad.

I leave you with this. It seems appropriate.

And if you would be so kind as to show me a little love that would be superb.


  1. Bonus points for the Bioshock picture.

    As for the woman in the video, I bet she feels pretty silly now, huh? You know, they say you shouldn't laugh at something like that, but really what can you do? It's too sad. It's too pathetic. It's just horrifyingly stupid. All I can do is either laugh, or fall into a frustrated rage that I share the planet with people that are this fucking dumb? And why do these nut jobs have to always try to take their kids with them, like they're "protecting them" or doing them some kind....Whoooooo, deep breath. Alright, I'm okay now.

  2. ...I am boggled by how they actually let the mother live. Save the kids, finish the job for the mother, rid the planet of another waste of flesh. Give the father an EASY button and move on. SCOTTINCOGNITO

  3. I agree with this Scottinc Ognito guy. I'm not sure who he is, but he's got the right idea.

  4. LOL at both Scott and Bryan. What a pair. And I agree. The mother is obviously unbalanced and should be put down as quickly as possible. And I really hope that the fool Camping loses his multi million dollar radio empire and his following over this foolishness. Even the people who worked for him didn't buy into his foolishness. He should be charged as an accessory to attempted murder.

  5. That woman is batshit crazy in a completely punishable way, and if that jury lets her off because she thought she was protecting her children, they should all be beaten! Good thing she's obviously a moron and didn't cut the right way on the wrists or deep enough on the throats...poor girls. THey're going to need some major therapy.

    But we're still here so let's throw a party!

  6. lol...I love when Chanel says 'batshit crazy'

    Quite frankly, I don't want to know when/how it's gonna end...I'd rather live my life and enjoy it instead of anticipating the end...Just me though

  7. I think Scott must get some secret thrill out of signing a comment "Anonymous" instead of logging in...

    In fact, I know he does because it bugs him that he can't leave anonymous comments on my blog.


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