Shit You Should Know

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Summer Can't Come Quickly Enough

Twenty seven more days until school is out for summer. I’m completely mixed about it. On one hand, the thought of not having a break from the kids is a little terrifying especially since my husband is deployed. On the other, this school year has been such a merciless headache that summer may just be the relief the kids and I need.


In the beginning of this school year, I was really struggling to get my son on track. He was being completely lackadaisical when it came to his schoolwork which caused his teacher to request that he be tested for ADD and ADHD. It not only turned out to be a false alarm but the tests showed that my fifth grader was reading on an eighth grade level. These results didn’t shock me but it did make me proud that there was now proof that there was nothing wrong with him. On the inside I basically chanted “Ninny ninny boo boo!” and “I told you so. Now shut the fuck up and teach my kid!!!”

Although his grades were improving, his dislike for his teacher became more and more defined. Many days the boy would come home and as soon as he would walk through the door he would began ranting about how awful his teacher was. We would sit down and discuss it. I would try so hard to help him see her side even though I was grappling with some of her ways myself.

He’s expressed to me that he feels as if she is always picking on him and singling him out. I explained to him that he is partially to blame. He gave her such a hard time in the beginning of the year that she now has her eye on him all the time. So now if he farts crooked, she’s going to know about it. It’s not fair but that’s the way the cookie crumbles, little dude. I told him the best thing to do is to stay off of her radar and the way to do that is to not give her ammunition. Trying to convince him to work harder and keep his mouth shut and his nose clean is like trying to convert the Taliban to Christianity.

Little by little I am finding out that this teacher’s way of solving the problem is by separating him from the rest of the class. At first I thought this consisted of her having to sit him next to her desk or something like that. That doesn’t bother me but I’m discovering through more and more conversations with him that she is sitting him outside of the classroom; I’m talking in the hallway or in the empty classroom next door. My concern is how the hell are you teaching my child if he isn’t even in your class?? I don’t understand how this can be helping his grades.

Yesterday, I went to speak to the guidance counselor. I expressed my concerns about the way the boy has been feeling in regards to how he is being treated. I explained to her that I am noticing a shut down on the horizon and I didn’t want it to affect the improvement he has made so far. I asked if she would maybe talk to the teacher and explain to her the affect that her style of discipline is having on my child.

The only reason have not gone to the teacher myself is I don’t think I can remain calm. Let’s face it. If you haven’t noticed my “mother bear” is showing. My child feels picked on and I’m ready to defend him. I don’t think I can talk to her without being very confrontational. Another reason I felt the need to bring a third party into the situation is simply because if this teacher truly is “picking on” my kid, I don’t want matters to get worse for him.

I also asked the counselor to talk my son. It concerns me how angry this has made him. When we talk about his school situation, you can see the fury in his eyes as they well up with tears and he clenches his fists at his sides. I thought maybe if the counselor tried to help him understand the teacher’s stance a little better, it would help. She agreed to have a conversation with him.

Later that same day was the last straw. He was late coming home. When I questioned him as to why, he said that she made him sit in the empty classroom next door. Since he was being punished when the bell rang he didn’t get up. He figured she was going to come over, lecture him, and then dismiss him. Apparently, this wasn’t his first rodeo.

When she didn’t come to speak to him after a few minutes of waiting, he said he peeked around the corner. She was sitting at her desk on the computer. It seems that she actually forgot that he was there. This infuriated me to no end!!! I called the school. The counselor answered the phone. I let her know what had happened and she advised me that I should meet with the principal. Hopefully, I’ll get a meeting soon and I keep reminding myself that this is all almost over.

14 comments:

  1. Teachers have pets. They also have anti-pets. *a* is one of the latter, as it sounds like your kiddo is too. I've had the same fight over, and over...and over with the school all year.

    Example-Birthday kids get a special crown for their day. Someone broke *a*'s. She started crying. The teacher sent her to the "Buddy Room"....for the entire day. She was allowed to return 15 minutes before the end of the day to pass out her treats. Some birthday, huh?

    I feel your pain, especially regarding biting your tongue. I actually told *a*'s teacher in a phone call once to send me an email because I didn't think I'd be able to have a calm, meaning not cursing, conversation with her.

    I remember there being Bad Teachers growing up. Let's hope next year, our kiddos get one of the GOOD ones.

    ~K

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  2. Does this teacher realize that your son had a friend murdered this year? That's bound to make any kid act out. Has she no empathy or common sense?

    Let your "mother bear" roar, this teacher needs some sense knocked into her. I hope your son has a different teacher next year.

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  3. I had an awful teacher like that. You just reminded me to write a post about her and get my internet revenge.

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  4. Time for "Mother Bear". My 38 year old daughter and I were talking about my mother bear episodes when she was in grade and middle school. Principals quaked in their boots if they knew I was coming. I spared no one. I never raised my voice and I never swore. Oh, I was in law school at the time. I think that helped.
    Your son is smarter than that teacher. Remind him of that. He has kept his temper so far. What a great young man you have!

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  5. I've noticed that it is the smart ones who sometimes have the most trouble. It can be frustrating sitting in a classroom while the teacher panders to the dumbest common denominator.

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  6. That's frustrating! Some people just shouldn't be teachers, but there they are, sitting in a classroom, making kids miserable. We had a big problem with a teacher harassing SAM, and it was a huge blow to her self confidence that she is still trying to recover from. Our school principal handled the situation very badly and the situation got worse rather than better...some people shouldn't be principals either. But I do hope that in your case the principal will do something to solve the situation. Hang in there!

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  7. Intelligent children are getting into trouble in class more these days because they are bored. The teacher teaches the same thing over and over again until EVERYBODY passes, and while it keeps the dunder heads from being left behind, it doesn't give the smart kids anything to do. You can only learn the same thing so many times before you start searching for a better alternative for your time. If you're not learning anything new, what's the point in listening?

    And my coworker also had trouble with her child being singled out by her teacher and being separated from the group. When her child was actually assigned to do a group project meant for four children by herself because the teacher was punishing her, she went to the principle. And the principle said that basically the teacher could handle her however she wanted. So she pulled her out of school and they moved to a better district.

    Not suggesting that, of course, but I'm just saying that there is something fundamentally wrong with the school system these days.

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  8. "Trying to convince him to work harder and keep his mouth shut and his nose clean is like trying to convert the Taliban to Christianity." BEST LINE EVER!

    I vote kick her ass with one of those pairs of hot shoes you bought (not my plaid ones), spit up her nose, fatten her lip, and then give her a black eye for me!

    Definitely keep us posted on this one. I definitely want to see how things go...

    Is he going to have this teacher again next year?? I hope not, for everyone's sanity.

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  9. I feel your pain, Asha. My son's in Kindergarten this year and has a drill sergeant for a teacher. KINDERGARTEN!!! She expects these 5 and 6 year olds to adhere to standards that most 8 year olds can't accomplish!

    Either way, I agree with the others that have commented before me: Give her a piece of your mind. Let Mother Bear show her claws. I hope you make her cry. If that doesn't work, go to the school board. This woman shouldn't be teaching children if that's the way she handles her classroom.(Putting him in a different room?!?! What the *@#$ is that supposed to accomlish? What a stupid, childish way to handle a situation!) Okay, rant over. For now.

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  10. To help you work out your...frustrations...I've made you an Overlord.

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  11. This really doesn't make me look forward to Brodie being in real school...I don't understand why teachers feel the need to be such assholes...I vote...Kick her ass :)

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  12. Now following you from the Bunny Hop! Have a wonderful Easter. Look forward to reading your blog! You can find me athttp://dinosaurs-and-dandelions.com

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  13. Newest follower- getting caught up on my blog hopping. Better later than never. Please return the favor and visit me too.
    Cheers-
    Mikey
    www.mikey-thesinglemom.blogspot.com

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  14. You seem to be handling the situation correctly and your son is also learning valuable lessons in dealing with authority. And it will soon be over as you mentioned.

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