Now I know some of you thought this post wasn't coming. Shame on you for not having faith in me. Your doubt makes me sad.
1.) It’s no secret I’m really into zombie/apocalypse stories. Recently, I started reading The Walking Dead graphic novels. Ummm, why am I just now doing this?? It has also been suggested to me that I read the book John Dies at the End by David Wong who is also a columnist for the infamous Cracked webiste. I’m on it! I suggest you head over to The Encyclopedia of Counted Sheep (when you're done reading this lovely post of course) and read Bryan's short short zombie tale. I'm not going to say he wrote it FOR me but I think he sort of wrote it BECAUSE of me. Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal.
2.) Our gardens are flourishing. That is a big deal all on its own especially since it has been left in my care. Back in the fall, I had to plant some bulbs and such that came in the mail. The husband had ordered them in the spring of 2010 and now he was relying on me to get them into the ground since he was away. Well, I’m proud to announce that shit is actually growing. An iris bloomed last week and another one is getting ready to do the same.
Apparently that black thumb of mine is more of a shade of gray…or maybe I just need to wash my hands better.
3.) This post has been getting some anonymous comment love lately. It seems there is something I’m going to be sorry about. Excuse me, while I get back to sacrificing virgins and drinking the blood of babies…or something.
4.) The kids and I hit up the local Goodwill store yesterday. As I picked through an endless array of romance novels, I came across a holy grail of sorts. I snagged the Lord of the Rings trilogy in a beat up old paperback for only 75 cents!! I had Billy Mays’ voice in my head yelling, “That’s a quarter per book.” How could I pass up this deal? How could I say no to Billy? I HAD to act now!
5.) Last but certainly not least, I am happy to announce that my husband will be home for good sooner than orginally planned. He decided not to do a second year in Afghanistan. Hooray! Now, not only will may sleeping habits return to normal (hopefully) I’ll be getting laid on a fairly regular basis. Whoot, whoot! Time for me to break out into song…”I’m so excited. I just can’t hide it!”
What?? Don't judge me. Don't you dare judge me.
Well, that's it AND you got it on Friday. Aren't you lucky?? Have a great weekend. I know I will. Margaritas in my kitchen...here I come.
It’s Friday again and that means it’s time for another Fantastic Friday Five. The post that contains random whatnots that don’t merit their own individual posts. I’ll just get right to it.
1.) I went the dentist and she bestowed the gift of painkillers on me. Technically, it wasn’t a gift. I TOTALLY earned that shit. I just hope my words make sense to other people besides just me.
2.) My husband will be here on Sunday!!! I am beyond anxious. He is actually leaving there tomorrow and flying into Dubai. He has to stay a night there and then he heads here. It is still a complete surprise for the kids and I am still planning on doing the scavenger hunt with them.
3.) I have a shoe addiction. I may need an intervention. These are my recent purchases. At least, I have stellar taste, right?
4.) I am completely frustrated that I am unable to find any updated news on Lancey Ray, the man that beat my son’s friend Malik to death back in December. His preliminary hearing was supposed to be Wednesday. I figured the media would have had something to say but there has been nothing. My son asked about it yesterday. More on this particular topic soon.
5.) The kids and I made a book run at Goodwill. The boy ended up finding the first three books to the series, 39 Clues, and the girl child managed to find a few Babysitter’s Club Little Sister books. As for me, I let me fingers do the walking and was lucky enough to find a copy of The Exorcist. I can’t wait to be engulfed in that book.
Well, that about sums it up. I’ve tried to keep it short this week. My brain is all over the place with the return of my honey approaching quickly.
One quick Girl Scout update: My daughter has sold 512 boxes so far. She is closing in on her goal of 600. Sales go on until the 24th so I am confident she will reach it especially since she has two Wal-Mart cookie booths scheduled. Whooty-whoot!
Another day, another call from my son's teacher...
What the hell am I going to do with him? Mrs. T said he has missed a few homework assignments. Great...it's like fourth grade all over again!
To back track...at open house she said that they rarely give work designated for at home. Instead, the students are required to finish any work they fail to complete in class at home. Easy enough, right? Apparently, this goes over my son's head. For the past few weeks he's been coming home with next to nothing in his backpack, telling me he finished it in class.
So now, Mrs. T and I are requiring him to have his planner initialed by each of us everyday. This is the sort of shit I was hoping he would be done with at this point. He is so much like my husband used to be...does just enough to get by no matter what his potential is. It's enough to make me want to shake the snot of him. Is shaken baby syndrome still relevant for a 5th grader? Would it be shaken pre-teen syndrome? They tell you not to shake your babies but I've never heard anyone say don't shake your almost middle schooler. I'd like to announce my advocacy to this subject matter. Maybe it would rattle some sense into his skull...you know, activate his "school is more important than my xbox" receptor.
Kids! Can't live with them...can't sell them on the black market. You know, when I was young and stupid I wanted five kids. Now I have two and I'm glad I'm one of those people that rarely finish what I start. Hooray for procrastination (and birth control)!
In other news...
Lately, I've been watching that show, Hoarders, on A&E. I purged the file cabinet of useless, outdated papers all while watching an episode. Does that make me bulimic?
I've been making the kids go through their rooms and bring me things that they don't use or want. Some things are being posted on eBay and some things are being posted on my local freecycle group. What ever is left is going to Goodwill.
My summer time guilty pleasure, Big Brother, has ended. It's a sick and ugly addiction, I know. Many times I thought my family would stage an intervention but I guess they just don't love me enough. It probably doesn't help that half of my family is addicted too. We need family rehab. After such a lousy season maybe CBS will not bring it back for a 13th season (yes, I fucking said 13...I'm as shocked as you are). If that happens we can all quit cold turkey.
The best news of the day...my husband got his first paycheck from the new job. I was able to catch up on all of the bills and still had money left over. No worries! I love it.
Any ho-ha...
As the title says, "not much to report"...hopefully, I'll have more to share soon. Don't
miss me too much.
Today I took my daughter to an ice cream social to re-register her for another year of Girl Scouts. Before leaving, we invited the guys to come with us to enjoy the creamy delights which they declined because Call of Duty is much more important.
Anyway, this year she is a Brownie and she is super stoked! I mean, c'mon, FREE ice cream BEFORE dinner. Who could resist that???
So, I asked her if she wanted a vest like her Daisy vest from last year or if she would prefer a sash. She looked at me quizzically and asked what the heck was a sash. First thing that comes to mind to describe one to a seven year old was to say it's like the piece of material that Ms. America wears. Almost before I could finish, she was like, "Oh yeah, Mom, I want THAT!"
There is a pint size diva hidden in my daughter and I don't know if I like it sometimes.
Afterwards, we made a stop at Goodwill. I swear, you would have thought I took the child to Sax Fifth Avenue the way she browsed the clothes informing me how "fabulous" everything was.
As I looked over the racks of used treasures, my daughter would pull shirts off the hangers and thrust them forward just to inform that "THIS shirt, mom, is sparkly and that is just awesome!"
She had a hard time deciding what to get. She wanted EVERYTHING! She wanted shoes. She wanted skirts. She wanted...she wanted...good thing we were in a thrift store.
After returning to our home, my daughter paraded in with her bag of goodies. She then preceded to rub it in my son's face that SHE had ice cream and went shopiiiiiing which, of course, led to bickering between them and all I got was this lousy migraine. So until bedtime, I had the pleasure of hearing how unfair life is from my son over and over again ad nauseam. Lucky me!
